Dissatisfied with the Obama administration for refusing to designate the party an endangered species after polls showed fewer than 20% of the population would "use a long pole to poke at a pile of Republican horse shit to see what it means," Republicans are stepping up efforts to “take the whole damn liberal world with us,” according unnamed sources in direct communication with God and Faux News, home to such questionable sources of rational opinion as Greta Van Susteran, Sean Hannity, Bill O'Reilly, and God.
In recent weeks, as the few surviving Republicans have ruptured their larynxes trying to force marginally rational to people believe their horse shit by ratcheting up the volume, those willing to identify themselves as Republicans has dwindled to just under 20% of those polled by legitimate news agencies. At the current rate of decline in numbers, Republicans may very well go extinct by the 2010 mid-term elections.
The real God approves, according to a poll conducted by the Pew Charitable Trusts.
Having staked the moral low ground by actively opposing anything Biraq Insane Osama does or proposes, the GOP circus now has more ringmasters than viable acts and appears intent on resurrecting itself as the ghost of old rummy Ronald Reagan, a man with so few ideas that no one noticed he’d been suffering from early onset Alheimer’s since 1967. So it goes.
And now the Republicans are blaming Biraq for George Dubya Bush’s deficit, wars, environmental enmity, stupidity, greed, and hemorrhoids, while claiming the head black man is taking credit for the good will the NOMF™ amassed during eight years of terminal rule by a cadre of thugs and crooks.
As if.
That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, that 300 bucks Fubar put in your pocket in January 2008 is what has turned the economy around, not anything Biraq has done. If you had invested your necromonic stimulus package back before the country was usurped by a Nigerian muslim, you would be a millionaire today, like Bernie Madoff.
Move along. Nothing to see here. The next iteration will surely be more entertaining.
Until 12/21/2012, have a nice day. My mother approves.